There is no place I'd rather be.
Sitting in this cabin tonight, I am overtaken by the presence and love of God. There is nothing more comforting and safe than truly encountering and knowing the Fathers heart.
I am in cabin 12, with the most precious 9-year-old-foster-girls. Each night when the lights go off, I pull out my guitar, worship with them and share bits of my story, and their hearts open more and more to the Love of Father God. The father's in their lives have either been completely absent or very unsafe. The word "dad" or "father" leaves them either close to tears or instantly upset.
Tonight I sat on the concrete floor in this little cabin and sang of the Father's love. I shared of the Father's love in my life, and their hearts opened up like flowers in the sunshine. Questions started sprouting up, wondering about the kindness and love I was sharing .. they seemed captivated by the thought of a good Father, that will never change His mind about them. They were amazed to hear of my faith and God's hand in every season of my life, through every home and in every moment, good or difficult. Last night precious Faith wept uncontrollably in my arms saying, "I want to know God so bad helen. So so much. I want to know Him, not just know His name, but know HIM." She asked me so many questions - the simple ones and the really tough ones, and I just sat patiently with her, sharing of the kindness of Father God. The gates of her heart swung wide open, inviting this Jesus in without fear or hesitation. Her child-like, pure-hearted hunger for God left me completely undone.
Tonight as I sit on my sleeping bag, I am equally as undone and in awe. I did the same tonight, pulling out my guitar and singing over these sweet girls. Answering their questions and sharing as I felt led -- tonight led into my story again - my brother, my mom, my foster families.. their hearts were so thirsty for a story of hope that paralleled theirs. God so sweetly walked into the room, the presence of Love Himself was so tangible, and as I closed in prayer, I heard little sniffles starting to form from sweet Brianna's bed. I stood on a chair, scooped her up in a hug, and heard the Lord direct me, "she just needs you to love her, beloved. Her heart needs my love." I held her as she wept. I played the "After All These Years" album by Brian and Jenn Johnson, filling the room with the kindness of the Father. Brianna's heart opened up and so sweetly began to trust God. I held her and held her, until the Lord released me to begin speaking life over her. Hope to her future. She so sweetly smiled and called upon the name above every name, with her hand on her heart, whispering "thank you jesus" feeling more safe and secure than she has ever in her life.
I sit here, completely undone by these little stories, and the privilege I have in translating the Father's love to them. I'm listening to "For the One" by Brian and Jenn, with tears of joy welling up. Can you believe the kindness of the Father? To save me, heal me, build me up and TRUST me with these little hearts?
There is no place in the world I'd rather be. My heart is so full.